Patriots. Jets. The Patriots are 22-point home favorites. That’s not enough… that not enough. Maybe that’s a first half line? Nope, that’s for the whole game. Well take the Pats to cover… Is there a need to evaluate this game? No? Want to just make fun of the Jets instead? Ok, lets do that. Oh, Jets, poor, poor little Jets. Back here again, I see. I thought we were done with this 22 point underdog in Foxboro thing. The AFC East lives in a perpetual state of 22 point underdogs to the New England Patriots. It’s like they’re in a superposition with being good. And this, even as the Antonio Brown Saga continues to swirl.

The NFL is the greatest soap opera known to man kind and don’t you forget it. Belichick doesn’t have time for your non football related questions, and now because of the media, asking questions, prodding, needing answers, the poor, sad, little pathetic Jets are going to die. Nobody and I mean nobody uses distractions more to his advantage than Bill Belichick. Belichick cut one of the best receivers in the game on a Friday and he’s going use the Jets as a human sacrifice on Sunday. May God help us all. The Jets? They’re screwed.

The Texans and Chargers are playing the Completely Irrelevant NFL Teams Bowl. The line is three favoring the LA Chargers, but the real number to look at is forty-eight and a half. That’s the over/under.

The match-up of the weekend is between the Chiefs and the sort-of Chiefs. The Chiefs are five-and-a-half point favorites at home against the Ravens.

That’s Lamar Jackson and Ravens star rookie Hollywood Brown. My main takeaway here is being in the NFL looks a lot like what I did in high school. Drive around, listen to music, find some place parents aren’t around to drink alcohol. Also Hollywood Brown doesn’t seem to know the lyrics as much as he’s trying to make it seem like he does. Anyways, Chiefs will cover. It’s Andy Reid in September. Andy Reid in September! Andy Reid is the Belichick t.